Lightening the Load

We are in the dark days of Winter, soon to come out the other side. Whatever our beliefs or traditions, this time of the year can be difficult. Right now, I am feeling a little bit brighter because I have tracked my food for one whole week on My Fitness Pal. It's interesting to me to notice the nutritional composition on my meals and to see just where the extra pounds are coming from. I have had to plan my meals a little more carefully and I am struggling with my wine consumption but I know that in the end it will pay off.

In most situations, I am a woman who perseveres. It is one of those qualities that all of my family share. My home life is tumultuous right now. The obligations of the season and the tension between Monsieur  and me is making life stressful. We are often told that this should be a "happy time" and that we should not "spoil it for others"but for both Monsieur and me, it is the first Christmas after the loss of a parent. Since my mother is still alive, there is something of an expectation that we can compensate for the loss of my dad. The last two Christmases have been hard ones for my mother: Dad went into Extended Care on December 23, 2011 and died January 4, 2013.

Tonight, Monsieur and I are attending a potluck dinner with my small Church group. I have not attended a  gathering with this group before but have prepared a healthy dish of green beans, pearl onions and toasted almonds. There will be Christmas music and activities as well as the meal.

This Sunday, the minister likened the journey to Bethlehem to the journey of life: there are joys and sadness that we cannot imagine. With faith and acceptance, our loads will be lighter and the brighter days will come.


  1. Adjusting to the loss of a loved one - a partner or a parent - is difficult any time of year. At the holidays it can seem so much harder.

    I wish you a peaceful and lovely holiday season.

    D. A.

  2. I've been hitting up against the loss of my Mom (and 13 years ago, my Dad) again, with the season's memories, especially as my sister just lost her father-in-law and there will be a funeral to pull grief back into view next week. Your focus on the things that matter, and even on the value of perseverance, is worthwhile, but I hope you also find quiet joy, peace, some solace in the soft candlelight, the glorious blending of voices. Take care. . .


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